Hey guys so I am sure you are all wondering how our meeting went......well it never happened. No joke 5 minutes after I finished my last blog I called to sign us up for the meeting on the 23rd and was informed it had been canceled :-( the lady at the church that I talked to did not know why it was canceled so I was VERY disappointed. Patience has never been a virtue of mine so we're back to waiting until April 5! UGH, it really isn't cool! So Mark and I are still enjoying our signs, we'll hear or see something look at each other and just smile. I mean we were watching The Rescuers (classic) and I got a little teary at the end when the little girl gets adopted! haha I know I'm a sap! Other than that not much has happened. Got an email from the MARE people from when we had put in interest for Sarah, she basically gave the same info BCS did so nothing new there.
So I've decided now would be a good time to answer some of the questions I've been getting from people when they find out we're adopting because I'm sure some of you have the same ones.
Do you realize how much it costs to adopt? Yes we realize how much it costs to adopt an infant, anywhere from 10,000-50,000 dollars depending on age, international/domestic, and such. But we are not adopting an infant which makes a huge difference financially speaking. Because we are adopting a child out of the foster care system the state picks up a large portion of the costs *and by large I mean all of it* Even though we're working through Bethany Christian Services because they are a contractor of the state we don't have to pay their fees. Our only costs will be related to when we go to court a couple months after our child comes to live with us. But on a similar note even if we did have to pay Mark and I trust God to take care of us, we feel called to adopt and that means we trust God to help us through this process physically, emotionally, and financially. If we felt called to adopt an infant to another country we trust God would help us find the money for it, but we don't so we're not worried about the money.
Do you realize this child could have 'problems'- Sigh, yes we do realize that a child adopted will have a whole myriad of problems whether they are physically, mental, or emotional. Again we TRUST God to see us through. Children who aren't adopted can have any number of problems just like adopted children, if we we're having a baby I don't think people would doubt our abilities to handle those. But I understand that kids who have traumatic childhood's deal with attachment issues, and other problems. We're prepared for this as best as any new parent can be. We (and by we I mostly mean me cause I'm the nerd in the family) have done lots of research on Attachment Disorders, and the other unique issues children who are adopted face. We feel confident in our ability to deal with these issues as they arise and are not afraid to reach out for help if we feel overwhelmed. The key to adopting a child out of the system is to recognize when you can't handle things and reach out to the different services (counseling and such).
Don't you want kids of your own- oiy as soon as the papers are signed Sarah or whoever we adopt will be OURS! Yes we would still love to have a baby, but if that isn't in the cards for us we've accepted that. We've been trying since July to get pregnant and that just hasn't happened. I'll be honest with you all so if you are uncomfortable with this topic skip to the next question. it's been rough journey for us, I've got PCOS *polycystic ovarian syndrome* which has a whole host of fun (sarcasm) symptoms. Main of these is not ovulating on any type of normalcy which makes getting pregnant very difficult. Though many people with PCOS successfully get pregnant through modern tech such as in-vitro Mark and I are not willing to go that route. Kudos to those who are we aren't casting judgment, but we already knew we wanted to adopt so we will have a baby if that is what is meant for us, but if not we'll gladly have a large family of kids who truly need us.
You're only 22/23 why the rush- Mark and I both want to be young parents, yes that goes against the modern trend of waiting til the late 20's early 30's but it is a lifestyle decision for us. We want to be able to enjoy our children and eventually grandchildren (yes I really think that far ahead) we also want a large family (at least 4 kids maybe more!) having a family is really important to us both Mark is going to be an amazing father and I'm really excited about being a mom. The more time I spend with kids (my girls on the run team especially) the more I look forward to it. We know that we can always find a reason to wait to start our family we could always have more money, more vacations, more whatever but none of that is more important to us that our family so we are willing to work a little bit harder to have it all.
Anyways that's about all I can think of for the questions people ask me. If there is more you want to know just feel free to ask. Guess that is all for now, I'll let you know how the meeting on the 5th goes.
Love you all
Nicole
No comments:
Post a Comment